Puppy Love

My family is extremely unlucky with pets. In total we’ve had four pets, and excluding fishes: three dogs and one family of cats and all pets have had horrible ends.

The cats were from a long time ago when my sisters and I were young; they chose our garage as their house and we couldn’t lose them. But there was a fire in our neighborhood, it reached our house so it pretty much got drenched and the cats disappeared.

Our first dog we named Warren (long story). He was a handsome little thing who terrorized the entire subdivision. Everyone hated him. Because we all went to school and none of us really wanted to take care of him, we didn’t put a leash on him and let him go around on his own. So, as unguided children often do when left unsupervised, he rebelled against us. He became the gang leader of the un-leashed dogs in our subdivision. Along with his friends, he wrestled garbage cans down, chased little children, pooped on other people’s yard, he probably got a lot of girlfriends pregnant too.

One day my sisters found him weezing on the living room floor. He was pooping blood and whimpering like it hurt. We still don’t know what happened to him. One of his gang members probably got jealous and slipped him some MSG in his food so he could take over their gang.

Our next dog was given by my cousin which we named Paris Nicole, after Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie. She was half Japanese Spitz and half Labrador so she had a Spitz’ fluffy fur and a Labrador’s size. Paris was pretty but she was also too energetic and stubborn. She refused to eat anything but fish which was causing her to loose hair, and ran around the house like she was possessed; she also almost bit a small child who went too near the gate. So one day I got home she was gone. My sister Grrr told me that our dad had a huge arguement with Paris that morning and the next thing she knew, Paris was gone. My sisters and I surmised that she found a handsome boy dog, got married and is now living in a little hut in the middle of a prairie; in short, she’s probably dead.

~more next time...